Healing a Frozen Heart

Had a client this week, a young man named Sam (not his real name) whose heart had become emotionally frozen. The problem had become so extreme that he not only lost all passion for life, but had developed a pretty severe case of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). Sam had called for help because even though he had just completed his degree is graphic arts, he found he lacked both the motivation and desire to get a job in his chosen field. In fact, he said he felt no passion at all for anything.

Once tuned into his guides, I received a vision of a young boy with cast on his left leg and bandages around his head and chest. The young boy was walking with the aid of a crutch. I quickly realized that they were showing me Sam’s inner child. At the same time I received the message that the way he handled his spiritual awakening with his parents was involved. So I said, “When you awakened, how did you handle that information with your family?”

“My mother reacted badly (she was raised Catholic) and totally rejected my beliefs.” He replied. The trauma of having his mother repeatably reject his beliefs literally froze him emotionally. It didn’t occur all at once, but at the end of 3 years, Sam was emotionally frozen with out of control OCD.

The next step was to help Sam understand the connections between how he handled his awakening, his mother’s reaction, his inner child’s reaction and his frozen heart/OCD. “Sam,” I said, “It that it is not uncommon for those on the spiritual path to believe that they need to convert their family members, but as you found out, it usually doesn’t work. The reason is doesn’t work is because it is not supposed to happen. If our family members were meant to awaken, their guides would ensure that occurred by leading them to the information needed. It is not our job to do their guides’ job. Does that make sense?”

“Yes,” Sam replied.

“So, I continued, your mother’s reaction was normal under the circumstances and here is why. We each have a set of beliefs that act as a foundation for our reality. When someone comes along and tells us that our beliefs are wrong they are, in essence, threatening our foundation. When people are afraid they react with anger. Your mom felt very threatened, and the more you pushed, the stronger she reacted. Does that make sense?”

“Oh yes, total sense,” Sam responded.

“So let’s talk about your inner child. Each time you pushed your beliefs and your mom rejected them, your inner child experienced that rejection as a threat of death. The reason is that in a primordial sense a mother gives life and a father protects that life. If a woman choses not to give birth, there is no life. Then, if she gives birth and does not give her milk, the child will die. And, in the absense of a father, the mother can also protect a child. So a child can do without a father but not without a mother. That is the primordial message of survival. Therefore, it is much harder for a child to be rejected by its mother than by its father. When a mother rejects a child, the threat is felt much deeper because it is primordial. The message that the inner child receives from that rejection is ‘I will die.’ Each time your mother rejected you, your Inner Child felt he was going to die.”

“When a child feels that threatened he/she will create ways to survive. Firstly, the child will seal off the hurt so it will not be felt. You can liken that to sealing the pain in frozen blocks placed in a wall around your heart. If freezing the pain in blocks does not completely do the job, the inner child will develop addictions or obsessions in order to medicate and further distract you from the pain. In your case one of those obsessions is checking and rechecking. Doing so distracts you from the real issue. Furthermore, the checking/rechecking is the child’s way of ensuring those frozen blocks do not melt or fall. Does that make sense?”

“Absolutely. Wow, this is making so much sense, Sam replied.”

“Finally, I continued, the obsession for cleanliness is your inner child’s way of dealing with the fear regarding the beliefs that your mother is rejecting. Your inner child sees those beliefs as bad because that is the message he received from your mother. Bad has become synonymous with dirty and unclean. Your inner child cannot make you clean away those beliefs so he does the next best thing: he makes sure everything else is spotless. Your inner child cannot stop the rejection of those beliefs, but he can minimize the threat to his life by ensuring everything else is acceptable. Again, does that make sense?”

After explaining all the connections, Sam understood how he got to where he was today. The final step was to help him take responsibility for it so that he could begin to heal. Using the knowledge of soul contracts as explained in “Contracts and Promises” I took him first through how he created the contract for this frozen heart/OCD during his time in the Interlife. Once he understood the contract, I then took him through the “Formula of Compassion“. Afterwards, Sam was able to not only assume that responsibility, but also release his mother from their contract and love her again. Sam was able to finally recognize just how terrified his mother had become each time he had told her that her beliefs were wrong. He understood that her faith was all she had to cling to and although his intentions were honorable, he had shaken that foundation. His mother’s anger was not only due to the threat to her foundation but that it had not been requested.

Healing Begins

Now that Sam understood how he his heart had become frozen causing the loss of passion and the OCD, he was able to begin healing. The first step was to gain knowledge of the tools along with developing a relationship with his Inner child. As he learned to parent his little boy, trust would develop. As trust developed his inner child would begin melting the wall around his heart, one block at a time. As each block melted, the pain in that block would need to be felt and cleared. I explained to Sam how to allow the pain to move through him, along with other steps to take to help that process along. As the blocks melted, Sam would feel more and more alive and the OCD would lessen. In time the OCD would be gone and Sam would find he had passion for life again.

As I hung up the phone I thanked Sam’s guides for sending him to me because so many are hurting in this same way. If you are one, know that that is most definitely a way to unfreeze your heart, heal, and have passion again.